How Stereotypes are Born

Living abroad will generally expand people’s horizons and make them more flexible, open-minded and empathetic – or, at least, soften the rough edges of the stereotypes they hold dear. Sometimes, however, one instead bumps into the living, breathing, all-too-real stereotypes themselves…

Right Reihe, Wrong Platz

The kids and I went to several movies last week to “celebrate” the end of Winter Break. Several recent releases were playing in “original version,” which means in English. The Germans sell movie tickets with seat and row numbers – you are asked when you buy your tickets whether you prefer front, middle or back seats. Because the transaction is most often in German and I’ve never been in an even close to full theater, I didn’t fully understand that a specific seat was being assigned until last week.

As it was a week day and the movie was in English, we initially found ourselves in a movie theater with one other person sitting five rows in front of us. We found a seat in the middle of the theater and sat down to wait for the previews. About 10 minutes before the movie was to begin, a German dad and son came in – audience members 4 and 5. Turns out, of the 200 seats in the theater, Audrey and I happened to be sitting in the seat numbers printed on their tickets. Now, bear in mind that there are at least 197 other seats in the theater to choose from…. Do this father and son simply chose a seat and sit down? No. The father has to tell me that we are in their seats and stand waiting for us to move. Before I could react, the other person in the theater - an American college student – pipes up that “probably the seat assignments don’t really matter.” The father apparently thought better of making a scene and sat right next to us instead with big sighs. Can you say rigid? Rule-bound?

Once the previews started – they realized they were actually in the wrong theater all together and got up and left with even more huffing and garumping.

A 12-Step Program to Losing Tax Revenue
Today, I went to the special post office location set up for collecting VAT taxes on anything of any value mailed to Germany. First let me say that I ordered something from eBay, shipped from the US that even with the exchange rate, shipping and the 19% tax the Germans slap on everything, was still cheaper than buying here.

So, here’s how the experience went:

1. Deutsche Post receives a package addressed to me from the USA with an estimated value of more than 40 Euro; diverts it to a special facility and mails a letter to me.

2. Mail man delivers a letter to me two days later, informing me I have 11 days from the day the package was received to pick up my package and includes one full page of related instructions.

3. I drive to another town to this special post office.

4. I present  myself, my ID (to verify I was the person it was addressed to) and the required e-Bay receipt printed from my e-mail.

5. The box is retrieved from the storage room and I am required to unwrap and open it for the clerk.

6. Upon verification that it was in fact what I ordered – after careful comparison of the contents with the receipt, the clerk goes to her desk and spends FULLY five minutes typing away at her keyboard.

7. Clerk presents me with SIX pieces of paper, stamps two of them with a rubber stamp and requests I sign one of them. She then instructs me to proceed to the cashier to pay the required 10.65 Euro tax.

8. The clerk tells her colleague (sitting next to her) to go over to the cashier window.

9. I take no more than THREE steps over to the security-glass cashier window and wait for the “cashier” to make her way from her desk, unlock the cashier office door and come to the window.

10. I slip my money through the small opening in the window and the cashier proceeds to write up – by hand—a receipt in triplicate, she stamps the original with a rubber stamp (just for good measure…)

11. I give the cashier one of my six sheets of paper, she gives me the original of the receipt.

12. Twenty minutes later, I get in my car with my package. The German government would now be richer by about 10 euro except for the fact that it has cost them no less than 20 euro in personnel time to collect it from me!

This could be chalked up to a guaranteed revenue stream if it weren’t so patently obvious that it costs at least twice as much to implement as it takes in.  Perhaps it is a full-employment scheme? Or, just flat-out love of rules, regulations and bureaucracy?

Just to Keep Us Off-Balance

I went to the regular post office today as well. In a move directed at keeping us completely off-balance, the German post office had a surprise up its sleeve: postage for a letter to the USA went down by 55% on January 1st. So, now it costs just 97 cents to mail a letter rather than the equivalent of $2.22! Perhaps they actually DO have a revenue stream coming from that “special tax office of the Post Office.” What do I know anyway?!